I think teens have taken the idea of “being in a relationship” and have “snow-balled” it into “till’ death do us part” kind of deal.  Too much pressure is being placed on these relationships.  A person “commits’ to a relationship, then next thing you know its “I love you”, being connected at the hip, and then going down the aisle. There’s a lot more to a relationship than that and it includes a whole series of discoveries. 

Let’s start from the beginning – forming a relationship:

  A relationship is formed between two people who have a mutual feeling of affection towards one another.  Whatever this connection is it is entirely different between various couples.  Some people form a relationship based on their differences, others on their similarities.  There is no social hierarchy to forming a relationship, but for some reason, there’s this idea that people are better than others, and it’s simply not true.  When you’re with someone, in a relationship – it depends upon the feelings between the two people, not what “level” they are on.  No one else can weigh in on how you feel about another person.  Either way, it’s not “do or die”.  This won’t be you’re only shot at being with another human being.  Love may or may not develop – it’s all in the hand you’re dealt and how you want to play it. 

“I love you”:

These are three very powerful, meaningful words that everyone aches to hear.  What happens when those words lose their meaning?  They’re used so frequently and insincerely that “I love you” is just as casual as “What’s up?”  It takes a while for that sort of feeling to well up in a person’s heart – I don’t care who you are or what “exception” you have to mention, it just doesn’t happen.  Don’t get me wrong, I believe in love, but I can’t stand when it’s tossed around so casually…  It’s nauseating! When you’re first with someone, it’s the thrill of holding someone, the physical attraction that you feel at first, and that’s what people decipher to be “love”.  Love is so much more than that.  Nobody has created an applicable, set definition for love, but can’t we agree that it takes time?  Its not life or death if you say it immediately and it’s certainly not crucial.   Waitt! Be patient and the next time you think you’re going to spew the “l” bomb, think.  Think of the emotional scarring that can come from being insincere with such a powerful emotion, state of being, or whatever it is you consider love, to be. 

“AAF” (always and forever)?

 If you’re with someone, it doesn’t always mean its forever – especially if it’s your first serious relationship..   I mean, it can happen, but let’s take it day by day.  Try it, its less suffocating. The initial joy and how smoothly everything goes can have a glamorizing affect on people that make them believe its forever, while in reality, its just puppy love.  There’s the royalty treatment that may include the sweet texts, maybe flowers, and other romantic gestures.  Try waiting a few months and then see what happens.  If you’re still going strong, then try a year, etc.  Time reveals all; it’s something I’ve learned in my own life experience.  It reveals a person’s true colors and you’ll find out if that connection is still there.  If it is, congratulations!  I’m rooting for all that find your relationship has withstood the test of time and hopes it continues to do so.  If not, why set yourself up for disappointment and humiliation by parading on about how you two will be together always and forever? 

What are the true intentions?

Now, I don’t want to go into to too much detail, but I have to skim the surface on this issue.  This is especially for you girls out there to pay attention to...  Be careful when a guy says “I love you” and “Oh, baby we’ll be together always and forever” etc, because sometimes it’s just a ploy to get into your pants.  I’m not saying it’s all the time, but notice when they say it – like how they time it.  Are you face to face, or cuddling with each other?  Or are involved in more “physical activity”?  Just be sure it’s meant for what it’s supposed to mean and that it’s not something to make you feel falsely secure.  If there is pressure on the subject, and one person doesn’t want to make the move for it- don’t feel obligated either.  Stick to your guns and what you’re comfortable with.  The person you are with should understand this if they truly care and respect you. 

If either person is completely stressed over a relationship, do yourselves a favor.  END IT.  You’re teenagers; you have a lot more to worry about than a bunch of “he said, she said”.  If one person cheats, end it!  It shouldn’t be complicated.  These are the “years of our lives”, why waste them on petty drama that can be spared.  Why create a long and messy series of battles over something that can be ended quite simply?  Sadly, I do understand this is easier said than done.  We all crave that affection that came with the start of the relationship, but there’s no point beating a dead horse. 

Make what you want of this.  I’m just a teen like most of you reading this and this is my opinion {obviously}.  Teen relationships should be fun and light hearted.  They shouldn’t be bogged down by pressure and drama.  Things can get serious, sure, but let it be on the couple’s terms.  My final advice is that whatever you decide to do with your future endeavors and relationships, think things through, be sincere, and be happy.